Monday
Mo: I don't feel good. I think I ate too much scrapple.
Carl: Me too. Half a brick each is too much. We know that now.
Tuesday
Mo: I don't feel good. My back hurts a lot over here when I lay down, sit up or breathe. I haven't made it out of bed all day. Blahrg.
Carl: Don't worry. It's okay if you're having an emotional day.
Tuesday Night (all night)
Mo's Fever: Hi! I'm 102.8!
Carl: OMG! Stop it! That's too hot for babies!!!
Mo's Fever: Shivering is fun!! Babies like to be warm, right? Lets sweat!
Carl: Take Tylenol! Get in the cold shower! NO PARBOILED BABIES!!!
Mo: *shiver, moan*
Wednesday Morning
Mo's Doctor: So, have you been urinating frequently or felt any pressure in your bladder?
Mo: Hi. Eight months pregnant here.
Mo's Urinalysis: You didn't see the blood in here??
Mo: All that water I've been drinking to quench the fire in my body must have diluted it.
Mo's Dr: Yeah, kidney infections happen a lot in later pregnancy. They can start contractions and early labor. Have you tried not having a kidney infection?
Mo: Um, yeah. That didn't work.
Mo's Dr: Oh. Well, take this antibiotic. It'll fix you good.
Antibiotic: *Fixes me good.*
Thursday
Carl: OMG don't do that again. Damn it.
Mo: "emotional day." hmph.
Carl: You are allowed to have an emotional day! You are NOT allowed to get sick! Damn it!
Mo: I really thought it was the scrapple. Like scrapple was finally taking vengeance.
Aqualass: Hey, does it still hurt when I stick my foot here? Yeah? How 'bout here? Interesting. Antibiotics aren't really food, you know. Could you send some peanut butter down here? Or soup. Soup soup soup.
Like a waterfall in slow motion, Part One
2 years ago
Remember that one time we ate at the Columbia Diner. It was bad. Sounds like you thought the same thing I did. Except exchange my vomitting for a fever and you should be close.
ReplyDeletehaha, crock pot
Wowch! 8o
ReplyDeleteGranted, Scrapple would have been my self-diagnosis too. I don't care how deep y'all are in PA Dutch country — it is TEH EBOL. (Hellfire, even the Scots throw away the hooves and teeth when making haggis!)
Glad they nipped it in the bud quickly...sort of...
But...it's so...de-LICIOUS!!
ReplyDeleteDelicious, malady-inducing porky bits......ahhhghghghghg.....