- I made an Irish Cream cheesecake with chocolate chips and coffee-flavored whipped cream for St. Patty's day. It was delicious. You wish you were here.
- I got bored the other day and painted purple flowers and mushrooms on the inside of the laundry room door. No one has yet noticed it. I am now planning a full-scale secret paint attack on the entire house. Closets, bathroom cupboards, it's all going down.
- I am the only person in the universe who posesses the manual dexterity required for moving hair from the shower drain to the trash. It's a great power, but also a grave responsibility. It's like being the Chosen One. People should bring me offerings of sweets and libations (i.e. brownies and tequilla) to honor my deeds.
- Now I have to go make brownies. Maybe I'll even save a few to share with others. Maybe.
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