Steph: But now we're grown-ups and have rooms and beds for that sort of thing.
Me: Mmm hmm.
Steph: Besides, our car way too small.
Me: I can't really talk about this, because I'm sitting here with Carl's Mom and step-dad having coffee and desert.
Carl's Mom and step-dad: *ignoring, ignoring*
Steph: Oh. Ok. Well, I'll catch you later, then.
Carl's Mom and step-dad: *avoiding eye contact*
Me: Well, now you think I was saying bad things about you or something. Car sex. She was talking about car sex.
Me: You two aren't a couple of squares. I can say car sex to you.
Step-dad: Really?? Hey, thanks!
(See how I smoothed that over? Totally smooth. That's me.)
People In Your Neighborhood
1 week ago