Thursday, June 23, 2005

...or there might be a tornado. Or a plague!

Bethany: I don’t suppose you would be interested in vacuuming the second floor? It really needs to be done before it gets hot again.

Me: …because the heat will really bake the dirt in?

Bethany: Nooo, I just won’t be able to stand the heat up there for more than five minutes, is all. Vacuuming will be right off the list.

Me: I love how you relate the possibility of cleaning to geological movement and large-scale weather patterns.


Me: "Once monsoon season hits, cleaning the basement will be totally out of the question."

Bethany: Look, a butterfly might be flapping its wings in Japan right now!


  1. i love how Bethany starts things with "I don't suppose you would be interested in ...", and from that point on become incoherent and turn into a request of some kind.

  2. yeah. It's her passive aggressive way of asking me to do something. She refuses to accept that I will never actually be interested in vacuuming or doing the dishes. I just won't.

  3. Who ever is interested in cleaning?

    Not this guy. That's for certain.

  4. It's not passive aggressiveness, it's misguided overpoliteness, something I get from my Eastside upbringing.

    What I *should* be saying is, "Will you do the fucking dishes because I'm fucking tired and can't fucking deal right now, and I know they're my fucking dishes but I'm fucking exhausted and asking for fucking HELP kthx..." but then it hits the filter and gets all garbled. My bad.

  5. filter, schmilter. I'll filter you!! YEAH!! I'LL FILTER YOU A NEW ONE!!! THAT'S WHAT YOU SHOULD BE SAYING!!

    OK, the caps lock got away from me there. Sorry. Go about your bidness now.